2007/02/06

Reset...

Although not many of you noticed, I disappeared. I disappeared within a one month sabbatical/retreat from life. It was a month of essentially nothing. An isolation I literally feared would tear at me. Torment. No cellphones, PDAs, computers, internet, radio, cable or any communication whatsoever. No junk foods, sodas, alcohol, nicotine, sweets or any other gluttonies. No sex (eep), no job, no schedules, no projects, no "gottas" and no "shoulds". I only read, wrote thoughts, discovered new beliefs, learned to meditate, slept when tired, cooked when hungry, ate simple foods, drank lots of water and generally cleansed the body and mind of old ways. And somewhere along the way, it became (and still is) the most spiritually inspiring moment of my life. A much needed and long overdue life "reset". At times, it was quite rough to give up basically everything in life, be alone and live somewhat like a monk, but it's a wonderful moment when you actually realize that you feel what life is truly about.

Now, coming back to the realities of here and now, I already feel the struggle to hold on to the path I discovered for myself, but I'm confident that I'll have a harmony of minimalist idealisms, life and art soon enough. Unfortunately, I'm not quite ready to "give it all away" and be truly free, but perhaps one day...